Grab the Regressor by the Collar and Debut!

Chapter 4: In Search of a Lost Dream (2)

‘Well… it wasn’t unexpected, right?’

I sat crouched in front of the playground near my house, trying to clear my throbbing head. Having rushed out unexpectedly, I was in slippers, and my feet felt frozen, on the verge of frostbite.

I tugged my long padded coat down to cover my toes, but the cold still seeped in. Maybe it was time to throw it away; after four years of use, it seemed worn out.

Given the circumstances, I needed to come up with a plan within ten minutes.

“System window. Sudden quest.”

My pronunciation slipped due to my freezing lips, but since I was alone, I let it pass. I pulled the zipper of my coat all the way up and examined the popping stat window.

[System Alert: Sudden Quest!]

Content: A child’s wound is a parent’s scar. Turn your mother’s heart and get her to recognize your reclaimed dream.

Deadline: In conjunction with SQ 01 (D-53)

Penalty for failure: 75% increased likelihood of triggering the 5th regression.

“?”

In that short moment, a penalty had appeared. I stared at the system window in silence, but there was nothing I could do to change it.

“What kind of life are you living, you Chosen Regressor bastard…?”

I started worrying seriously about the fragile mental state of the Chosen Regressor. Sure, there was a reason he’d regressed four times already. Even with my mental fortitude, the thought of regressing again was daunting; I could only imagine how it must feel for him. The system must have been so frustrated that it attached me as some sort of ‘mentor.’

“But still, isn’t that probability way too low?”

I continued grumbling, and before I knew it, two minutes had passed. Ah, there was no time. I needed to think of a way to persuade my mom within eight minutes.

‘Studying is the easiest option, but…’

Having lived as my mom’s son for 19 years (about 3n years including past lives), I knew that saying, “I’ll attend a university in Seoul while being a trainee,” could make a decent argument. I could present concrete figures like mock exam scores.

But the problem was…

‘It’s too late. It takes too long.’

The college entrance exam was already over, and I needed to become a trainee within two months. Moreover, juggling studying and trainee life was easier said than done; it was akin to sacrificing my youth and cutting short my lifespan. Though, pursuing a career as an aspiring celebrity was always like that.

[System Alert: 5 minutes remaining!]

“…Thanks.”

My nose and cheeks were losing feeling. Think, Kang Hajin. You’ll freeze to death like this.

I racked my brain to come up with the most effective way to persuade my mom based on all my life’s experiences.

A hunger strike? My mom’s cooking is too good to pass up. Rejected.

Running away from home? Look at my current state. Leaving home would be a nightmare. Rejected.

Crying and throwing a tantrum? That didn’t work since I was five, yearning for a transforming robot. Rejected long ago.

“…No, not doing that.”

Should I just… just regress again? Memorizing ten years’ worth of lottery numbers over the next two months seemed less daunting. With my mental fortitude, maybe I could tough it out?

[System Alert: 3 minutes remaining!]

[System Alert: The Mental Care System is not invincible!]

“Now you’re interfering. Fine, do whatever you want.”

[System Alert: Request received.]

This system doesn’t understand Korean irony. It clearly needs a better Korean language patch.

“Hey. Mom said to come in for dinner if you’re done with your teenage angst.”

Just as I was having a pointless staring contest with the system window, my 18-year-old brother, who still looked small and precious, called out to me, clearly annoyed.

Seeing my still young brother rekindled my determination. Right, I couldn’t give up…. If I did, he’d end up going to the army three times.

“It’s not an act. I’m serious.”

“A serious person wouldn’t run out like that.”

“I didn’t run. Each step was filled with genuine intention.”

“If your teary, ‘Mom, you don’t understand anything~!’ act was genuine, then you’re really hopeless.”

Watching my brother clumsily mimic me made me feel a bit disillusioned. I hadn’t realized I looked like a character from a clichéd teen drama.

And calling it bad acting—how genuine I had been in that moment.

“You don’t understand anything….”

“Brother, what kind of battles are you fighting alone?”

“This is a war.”

A colossal war involving re-enlistment, re-admission, and re-employment.

“Brother, you need to understand. Mom seems to be thinking a lot these days too.”

“…….”

My brother’s awkward voice instantly made the atmosphere heavy. It hit me anew that it was the winter of my nineteenth year.

“About dad’s situation too….”

Dad’s unemployment.

Knowing the future, I knew that around the beginning of next year, Dad would settle well in a company he interviews with, turning our misfortune into a blessing.

It was the reason I never despaired, even waking up every morning in a dingy semi-basement instead of a sunny apartment after regressing.

“It’s just that the family’s atmosphere is a bit heavy these days. And then you suddenly say you want to be a trainee again….”

But before that future came, our family lived in an unending winter.

Seeing my brother, standing in hand-me-down clothes with a face that looked like he might cry at any moment, made me realize anew that today was one of those cold winter days.

“I want to contribute to the household by getting a part-time job, but they won’t let me do that either.”

I looked up at my brother, who was venting his frustrations. I felt something stirring inside me.

“Hawon.”

“What.”

“Just do what you want to do, man.”

“…….”

“Right now, that’s helping mom and dad.”

My brother didn’t respond.

I gathered my strength and stood up on my legs, which felt like they were about to break from the cold. It felt like someone had suddenly yanked a loose string tight.

I had to stop this regression no matter what. I couldn’t let my family remain stuck in this winter forever.

“Hawon.”

“…Ah, why do you keep calling me.”

“I’ll become an idol this lifetime.”

“How will you get mom to agree?”

[System Alert: 10 minutes have passed!]

“There’s a way, man.”

I said I’d come up with a plan within 10 minutes, didn’t I?

* * *

Hajin’s mom, Young-in, looked at Hajin with suspicion, wondering why he was so quiet.

‘Why is he so calm?’

It had been a few days since he dropped the bombshell of wanting to prepare to become an idol trainee again. That day, when Hajin returned with his brother, Young-in had braced herself, but Hajin had simply devoured two bowls of rice and even volunteered to do the dishes as if nothing had happened.

‘…Was that the plan?’

Now that she thought about it, Young-in noticed that Hajin had been doing more housework lately.

Although the household chores were always divided among the family, Young-in hadn’t touched a single drop of soapy water except when bathing. It felt strange, but her body was at ease, so she kept stopping herself from thinking further. Instinct always won over reason.

“Hajin.”

“Yeah?”

“…Never mind.”

Still suspicious, she tried calling out to Hajin, but he just looked at her with his usual calm face.

To be honest, she wanted to tell him to live his life to the fullest and pursue whatever he wanted.

It was her own regret for not living that way, and her resentment toward her parents for not teaching her to live like that. In reality, she had always supported her sons’ dreams and still did.

But she had learned that blind support could sometimes corner a child.

-Stop talking about possibilities.

Young-in still couldn’t forget that day with Hajin.

It was the first time Hajin had expressed his intention to end his five-year trainee life.

-Why, Hajin? I believe in you. You can do it.

-Mom, sometimes…

-…….

-I’m scared of my future, that I won’t achieve anything significant. That I’ll disappoint you.

That day, Young-in realized for the first time that her blind faith in her child could make him fearful.

-If I don’t achieve something after you’ve believed in me so much, it’s all my fault.

-…….

-So, I’ll do something else. Not something with potential, but something I’m good at.

So, when Hajin said he wanted to be an idol again, she was scared.

The unstable household situation and Hajin being a student flitted through her mind, but more than that, it was the memory of that day that weighed heavily on her heart.

Young-in couldn’t bear to see Hajin, who always shone, break his wings again. She couldn’t keep promising an uncertain future while living a life on a tightrope, where every moment was judged. Especially since it wasn’t even about debuting yet, but just an audition to become a trainee.

“Mom.”

While lost in these thoughts, her son Hawon, with a somewhat sheepish voice, called her.

“What is it, son? Do you need something?”

“Well…”

Hawon hesitated, glancing at her expression, and pointed to the master bedroom.

“Brother wants you to come in. Dad’s there too.”

“Hajin? Why?”

“Well…”

Sensing something off, Young-in quickly headed to the master bedroom. Her husband, already seated, greeted her.

“Hajin?”

“Come here, honey. He’s up to something.”

Hajin, who had changed back into his school uniform long after returning from school, was standing upright in front of the computer.

Feeling bewildered, Young-in let Hawon guide her to a seat. There were two pre-arranged chairs, so Hawon squatted next to them, ready to watch his brother’s one-man show.

“Mother. Father.”

“Since when did you call us that….”

Ignoring his father’s curious glance, Hajin smiled confidently and turned on the monitor.

“I will now begin Kang Hajin’s life plan presentation.”

A sleekly designed PPT slide filled the small monitor screen with flashy effects, marking the start.

* * *

“Before explaining this plan, I thought it was essential to first have a clear understanding of what I currently possess and what I’ve done so far.”

Did I ever mention that I have some experience organizing team project materials?

“These are my strengths and weaknesses, summarized using the SWOT analysis method.”

To add, I’ve also poured my soul into creating PPTs before.

The next slide, designed with a clean and tidy aesthetic for my parents’ readability, transitioned smoothly.

The font was chosen for readability and visual appeal, with only the key points of the presentation perfectly arranged. These slides were the result of hours of meticulous work, monopolizing the computer under the pretense of needing it for online classes.

I could confidently say I hadn’t prepared even my major course final presentations this diligently.

“Hawon, do you learn this kind of stuff in school these days?”

“Just my brother being weird.”

While I could hear my dad talking to Hawon in amazement, I calmly continued my presentation.

When I explained the target university’s current entrance requirements, my grades, and special activities based on real interviews with my homeroom teacher, I could see Hawon shaking his head, looking exasperated.

“Next, I will explain about Miro Entertainment and the reasons and vision behind my choice.”

Already half-persuaded and clapping, my dad was sitting next to Hawon, who murmured,

“…That brother of mine is using cheat codes.”

I can hear you, man.