I Can Hear the Saint’s Inner Thoughts

30 – Saintess Victoria’s Secret (1)

The Holy Kingdom’s forbidden archive was a place packed with a vast amount of books and documents. Despite the ruckus we had caused fighting the Lich, it was completely undamaged.

“This is even more impressive than the Mage Tower’s library…”

My teeth slightly parted as I looked at the density and level of the defensive magic before me. There were even more stringent spells layered here than the ones I’d seen in the mage facilities at the tower.

“Is it really that amazing?”

Victoria stuck close to my side, matching her steps to mine. She kept trying to get me to link arms, and I only just managed to compromise by holding her hand.

“These are at least sage-level spells.”

Mages are categorized into levels according to the number of rings in their mana cores: Beginner, Intermediate, Advanced, Dragon, Sage, and so on.

Originally, it was said to have been established by Odin, the chief god who laid the foundation for magic, and that no mage could surpass it.

“Isn’t that something Astal-nim can do as well?”

“I can barely imitate it. The big drawback is that if I ever encounter a sage-level mage, my magic would be easily deciphered.”

Victoria knew I was at the level of a sage, and that I could use magic of a higher level through three-dimensional magic circles.

I lowered my head at her question. In the end, just like a fake can’t surpass the real thing, a hastily made substitute is not the same.

Just like my fake contract relationship with Victoria right now.

“…In the end, this battle against Leozeck, we’d have lost if it wasn’t for you.”

“Are you only just now feeling the emptiness of your lover’s absence? Yes, I do think I’m quite impressive.”

– You have a talent for making me fall for you. When I found out you had secretly come to the Holy Kingdom, I was really surprised.

I only stated the fact, but Victoria’s lips were curling upwards, and she was practically shoving her head at me, as if begging for praise.

It seemed Victoria’s inner thoughts had volume that varied depending on distance. If I had paid a little more attention to that small noise earlier, I could have avoided embarrassment.

“We’re just fake lovers for a month anyway.”

I said it dismissively, trying to go deeper into the restricted archives. Because all I saw around here were black magic forbidden by the holy kingdom, or s*xually explicit spring paintings.

Honestly, I was more interested in black magic than these openly lewd pictures. For a mage, the most essential virtue is a thirst for knowledge.

“If that’s really the case, then why did you risk your life for me? You didn’t have to go as far as creating a space-time portal with your bare hands.”

– This definitely means she feels more than just friendly affection towards me. Even I, who knows nothing about romance, can tell! She hasn’t even glanced at the spring paintings right now…!

Victoria looked at me carelessly tossing the lewd picture aside, a playful smile like a cat’s forming on her face.

“…Perhaps, you’ve fallen for me?”

– Alright, just give me the right answer! This Victoria will gladly accept your confession!

Victoria spread her arms wide, striking a magnanimous pose. She even exhaled, as if she was sure of something.

“That will absolutely never happen, so relax. I would have acted the same way even if Kyle were in that situation.”

I furrowed my brow as I retorted to Victoria. I would have risked my life for anyone in our party if they were in the same situation as she was.

“…Then, why did you get angry at people who were calling me a witch? It was as if I was truly your girlfriend.”

– That’s the first time I’ve ever seen him that angry…

As Victoria spoke of this, there was no one else nearby.

Earlier, because the Saint Victoria had made the strange request to touch her chest, Wilhelm had wisely gone upstairs, keeping his distance.

“Don’t you think you’d get mad if people called me impotent?”

“No. Why would I get angry at someone stating the obvious? I haven’t seen it grow or harden, ever.”

*Whoosh.*

Suddenly, Victoria linked arms with me, pressing her chest as close to me as possible. Then, she focused her gaze on my crotch.

“…….”

“Look now. Isn’t it odd that there’s no reaction even though such a beautiful woman is right next to you, provoking you?”

– The important thing is the details… I need to etch the feel of my soft touch onto Astar’s brain while his guard is down.

I clenched my fists, even biting the inside of my cheek, trying my best to stop the blood from rushing downwards.

Unlike before, something felt different. It wasn’t just playful teasing; it was a chilling sensation of genuine feelings colliding.

“It’s uncomfortable, can you walk a little further away?”

I spoke to Victoria as coldly and brusquely as possible, trying to gently push her away with a bit of force. But…

“I won’t move. No matter what anyone says, I am your lover for the next month.”

– I’ll keep appealing to you until we return to the Demon Realm. Smoking and drinking are bad for you, you know…

She puffed out her cheeks slightly, struggling to stay in my arms, desperately trying not to break free.

Victoria’s attitude had changed from what I’d expect—calling me a perverted monkey or spewing vulgarities laced with curse words.

‘Did Victoria eat something bad…? Or was it an enemy attack?’

A chilling sensation, like a blade piercing my heart, made me glance around, checking for enemies.

This was, after all, the forbidden library of the Holy Nation Aurelium. Even if the key was with the Pope, it seemed strange not to have any guards.

“The golems are all smashed to bits. Looks like Leozak’s doing…”

The golems, as if they had cores crafted from compressed divine power, all had gaping holes in their chests.

The murky traces of magic left behind looked, without a doubt, like the work of the black mage Leozak.

“Astal, do you truly want to save me?”

At that moment, Victoria stepped in front of me, adopting a blocking stance. Her legs and arms spread wide, as if saying, ‘You can’t go any further.’

“…There’s something ahead, isn’t there?”

Seeing Victoria’s actions, I realized something. Judging by the way the people of the Holy Nation spoke and acted, it seemed she hadn’t been comfortable here.

“Yes, you might be disgusted by me, but are you still okay with it?”

-Because I hid from you that I’m dying.

Victoria bit her lip, a look of desperate resolution on her face. Her body and inner thoughts trembled slightly.

“Like it matters, I had no expectations of you in the first place.”

“Can I take that as you have such low expectations of me?”

-You’re disappointed in me. I mean, I’ve been denouncing and provoking you all this time, it’s weird that I’m now saying I’m about to die…

Victoria forced a smile, trying to hold back her tears, but hot liquid was slowly trickling from the corners of her eyes.

Hearing her words and inner thoughts, I knew I couldn’t say anything. An uncomfortable feeling gripped my heart, tightening its hold.

“It’s nothing like that, don’t worry. I could accept you even if you were a demon instead of a saint.”

“You, who loathes demons and fiends that killed your parents…?”

“Yeah, if it’s you, Victoria.”

Thump─.

I placed my hand on Victoria’s head, continuing to speak. My large, scarred hand met her soft, shimmering hair.

For the first time, I was glad that I was wearing bandages. Otherwise, Victoria might have disliked the rough, coarse feeling.

Pat-pat.

It was the first time I had initiated physical contact with Victoria. I just didn’t want to see her gloomy expression any longer.

“So, don’t worry too much. I’ve had some suspicions about it all along.”

“…Lord Astal?”

Victoria’s eyes widened, looking up at me from below. Her lips were now glistening under the light of the lamp.

– Ah, so you’re going to kiss me now.

As if sensing something, Victoria squeezed her eyes shut. I watched her for a moment, my gaze shifting.

Should I just go along with her expectations?

‘I’m kind of embarrassed, even though I said it…’

I felt sorry and pitiful for Victoria, who was trying so hard not to let anyone know she was terminally ill, and got caught up in the moment, blurting out those irresponsible words.

If I just let it pass without doing anything, wouldn’t she lose faith in what I said? Victoria was definitely a trustworthy person among my colleagues.

Like Leozaak the Lich said, we might not even find the solution to her miracle.

“……”

“……”

And so, for several minutes in the quiet, deserted restricted library, an awkward silence hung between Victoria and me.

*Thump.*

I had no choice but to come up with a compromise.

I pressed my thumb to my lips, then transferred it to hers.

“I don’t know what you were expecting, but be satisfied with this for now.”

It wasn’t even a proper indirect kiss, more like a childish game. This way, at least she won’t spiral into self-loathing and spread gloom.

“Ughh……”

– Something touched my lips. Touched them. Touched them…!!

Feeling the touch, Victoria opened her eyes, face slightly flushed and fanning herself, as if she’d broken into a sweat in that instant. Her movements were clumsy as she shuffled aside, which looked quite comical.

“…You’re a coward. And you’re really clueless.”

“Just so you know, I was originally just going to pat your head? You’re the one who closed your eyes.”

Realizing that it wasn’t a real kiss after all, Victoria let out a frustrated sigh and crossed her arms, starting to talk to me again.

“I’m not your real lover. You should save the next one for someone you really like.”

I spoke flippantly to Victoria, trying to tease her for her flustered reaction.

“Why, did you really have feelings for me? You even closed your eyes, were you hoping for a kiss?”

“……”

If I didn’t do this, I felt like I might really develop bad feelings for Victoria.

“Sorry, but I’m married to alcohol, cigarettes, and magic. You’d better find someone else.”

I made up those words, feeling like a fool, and moved further into the depths of the restricted library.

* * *

Victoria Everhart’s heart was pounding like crazy. Not from a deep, passionate kiss, but something as light as a child’s play.

‘…How did these feelings grow so big?’

At first, she’d thought he was just a creepy guy after a holy woman like her. The type who’d kneel before her and spout cheesy lines.

‘In your presence, I’m nothing but a pathetic slave to love.’

Spending time with him, Victoria realized that Astal’s words back then had been sincere. He didn’t truly desire a miracle, even showing respect by asking her not to use her powers.

‘Booze, smokes, and married to magic, huh…’

Right now, Victoria had deliberately nestled Astal’s arm between her breasts, maximizing skin contact. She even swayed as if falling, letting the physics work to her advantage, highlighting her best assets.

Astal’s grip kept tightening, the pulse in his veins throbbing and visible. It seemed to be working.

She used to hate that only her breasts were plump, thinking they were grotesque. But now, she felt a surge of pride, knowing she was bigger than the women in erotic paintings.

‘…Just you wait and see who wins. I’ll make you my husband within a month, no matter what.’

Victoria, with a chilling resolve, mapped out her plan to make Astal fall for her. Like a predator lion sizing up a rabbit.