Soul Guardian

On the car ride back something was bothering Maharet and Bael was willing to bet that it wasn’t the smart car Murphy had pancaked on his way out of parking lot. Bael tried to ignore it at first but eventually caved. “What is it?”

“We aren’t spending enough time with Six.” Maharet said. “The book I’ve been reading says that children need to do activities and spend time with their foster parents in order to create healthy relationships.”

Too bad she was currently avoiding both of us, Bael thought. “What do you suggest?” He asked instead. “What exactly do normal human families do together anyways?”

“See movies, go camping, build things together” Maharet stopped and shook her head, she had an image in her head of Bael accidentally nailing his hand to a bird house. “I know you probably want to try out your new power tools but maybe we should avoid that last one.” Then she thought about Bael attempting to start a campfire or pitch a tent. “Why don’t you and her choose a movie to go see?” She said helpfully. “We can pick up a newspaper on the way back home and see what’s playing.”

“Well she does like movies.” Bael stroked his beard. “I’ll ask her when we get home what she wants to see.” To his surprise he was looking forward to watching a movie with Six. He missed spending time with her. Of course, that was all moot if she didn’t want to spend any time with him.

***

When Maharet finally had the house to herself and she was sure that Bael and Six weren’t going to come back and bother her she drew herself a bath. Of course her fiery nature raised certain complications so it ended up being an ice bath. Her first attempt had resulted in a boil over and at that point it had been a toss up between getting out and calling off the whole thing or throwing in some pasta and just rolling with it. And while Bael had liked her lavender flavored spaghetti it had somewhat diminished her enjoyment of the whole bath experience.

She eyed the bath salts critically. The instructions said one cup per bath but she hadn’t ever been one to half-ass anything so she threw the whole carton in along with three bags of ice, a half bottle of bubble bath and something the sales associate had called “Sensual Seductive Oils”. By the time she was done there was almost no room left for the water. But if she was going to relax she was going to go all out and she wasn’t going to let anything, even her own heated nature, screw it up.

(It was the paradox of type A personalities that they almost never took the time to relax and when they did they tended to go a bit overboard. A normal person might decide to stop and smell the roses, but a type A personality would stop and smell ALL OF THEM. They would get a book on roses, take notes, talk to their friends about roses for weeks at a time, possibly take up gardening, maybe build a greenhouse. Then a month later completely forget about the whole thing.)

Of course, she hadn’t counted on Zephyr coming through the doorway just as she was about to get undressed. Maharet resisted the urge to flame broil the angelic interloper, for now. “What in Satan’s trident are you doing in my bathroom?” She hissed.

“I needed to talk to you while Bael wasn’t around.” Zephyr explained. He looked from the bathtub full of ice to the empty carton of salt. “Are you making ice cream or something?”

“No,” She replied through clenched teeth. “I was attempting to take a relaxing bath. I had read about them in my book and I was looking forward to finally trying one for myself.”

“Forget that, we need to talk about your situation.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a sheet of paper. “I did a search on Six, she drowned two years ago. That’s a bit of a problem if you want to get her adopted.”

“That bastard Mike.” Maharet cursed under her breath. Six certainly wasn’t undead so there was only one probable reason why she had been listed as deceased. “He must have had a follower that worked for the coroner’s office. If she was dead that meant he was free to sacrifice her at his leisure. You have to fix this, and fast.”

“We could, or… stay with me now. What if we don’t?” Zephyr asked, turning on the charm. “All you have to do is let the timer run out and Bael is stuck on earth. You can go back to hell with him when he resigns, then send him on his merry way.” He reached over to rest his hand on her shoulder. They were close now, only inches between them. “In the meantime, maybe you and I could get reacquainted. There’s no reason your time here should be a total loss.” Zephyr smiled and leaned in for a kiss.

Maharet grabbed the scheming angel by the throat and threw him into the icy bath tub. The confined space stopped him from extending his wings and the slippery porcelain offered no surface for him to grab onto. The rest was simple physics. She had the high ground so all Maharet had to do was lean forward and use her own bodyweight to pin the helpless angel. ”You must think I’m an idiot.” She said menacingly.

“What are you talking about?” Zephyr sputtered as he tried to keep his head above water. “I’m trying to help you!”

“The hell you are!” Maharet shouted back. “Bael doesn’t have to go back to hell to resign. In fact, I know him well enough that I can guess if he finds out I betrayed him he’ll keep me with him out of spite. And I’d bet you would just love that, me trapped here on earth while you can come and go as you please.” She shoved the helpless angel back under the water to reflect on his deceptions.

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“Alright, you got me. You figured it out. Trapping Bael here was my plan all along, getting to spend time with you was just a bonus.” Zephyr choked out once she let him back up for air. “But that doesn’t matter because without my help you’re both stuck here. The way I see it you have two choices. Do exactly what I say from here on out, or get used to the idea of spending the rest of your life here on earth.” He smiled, so smug now that he thought he had won. But if she was defeated, Maharet didn’t seem to know it.

There was a look in her eye that he hadn’t seen before. It wasn’t anger or fear, it was as if she was sorry for him. “You aren’t our only option.” She explained. “There’s no reason we can’t take a family off the street and bewitch them. See, I’ve thought about it and there is nothing in the language of the wager that means the adoption has to be legal or voluntary. They just have to love her. We don’t need you.”

“What does that mean for me?” The angel asked, suddenly aware of his precarious position.

“Did you ever hear that anecdote about the frog in the ice bath?” Maharet asked casually as if she was about to share some fun fact. “They say that if you want to cook a frog the best way is to put it into a pot full of icy water then gradually turn up the heat. The idea is that if the change in temperature is gradual enough the frog won’t notice until it’s too late.”

She leaned in close and pushed her free hand into the water. It was like shoving a freshly forged sword into a quenching trough. The water started to boil around her fingertips and gouts of steam shot to the surface.

“Believe me, Zephyr. I tried it once, the frog beat itself to death against the lid trying to escape. I firmly believe that it would have done anything to avoid the pain of being boiled alive. Can you imagine that, being boiled alive?” Maharet asked sweetly.

“You wouldn’t...” Zephyr said, but he didn’t look so sure of himself anymore. Warm currents were starting to caress his skin and the ice cubes were vanishing like stars at sunrise. “You couldn’t…”

Maharet gave him a look of pure malice. “You were going to take advantage of me, Zephyr. Believe me when I say that you have no idea what I’m capable of.”

***

“Were you cooking... chicken?” Bael asked when he got home. There was the smell of cooked meat in the air but he couldn’t tell what kind.

“I believe the term is poaching.” Maharet said with a smile. There was no reason she had to tell them just yet about Zephyr’s attempted betrayal. She changed the subject. “How was your movie?”

“Great! Six loved it. How was your chicken? Got any leftovers?” Bael, as always, had a one track mind when it came to food. She suspected that if Bael ever died he’d find a way to sneak snacks into his own funeral. It would be the first burial service in history to be interrupted by the guest of honor noisily opening a packet of chips.

“Unfortunately no, I tossed what was left over.” More accurately she had thrown Zephyr out the bathroom window to limp home and lick his wounds. He would be fine, eventually.

“Well, hamna shida.” Bael said with a shrug.

“Excuse me?” Maharet asked.

“It’s Swahili, it means no worries.” Bael said, a smile hinting at the corners of his mouth. He hip checked Six softly to get her attention.

“For the rest of your days.” Six elaborated. She looked up at Bael like they were sharing some secret joke at Maharet’s expense.

“It’s our new philosophy.” Bael explained with a grin. “Apparently, it’s problem free.”

“Hamna shida.” Six repeated helpfully.

“Well aren’t you two getting along well.” Maharet observed. “You both must have really liked that movie. What was your favorite part?”

Bael grabbed the banister and did his best impression of a man hanging over the edge of a cliff. “Brother, help me!” He cried.

Six prowled up the stair like a lion and stuck her fingernails into the tops of his hands. “Long live the king!” She said sinisterly. The whole scene might have been more dramatic if the two of them hadn’t broken up laughing.

“You two are ridiculous.” Maharet said with a shake of her head. “Alright I’m going to have a glass of wine and turn in for the night.” She gave a pointed look at Bael. “Don’t you two stay up too late. We have an appointment with the adoption agency early tomorrow.”

“Oh goody.” Six said with a roll of her eyes. “Will I have to wear a dress?”

“That would be preferable.” Maharet replied. “We have to take some pictures and I want us to look as boring and normal as possible.”

“Will I have to wear a dress?” Bael asked with a mischievous little grin from his place on the carpet.

“No. You don’t have to wear a dress.” Maharet said, her face serious and somber. She felt a smile starting to form but locked it down.

“Can I wear a dress?” Bael pressed. He was grinning like an idiot now.

Six was looking at Maharet with a grin just as wide as Bael’s. She knew what was coming.

“No!” Maharet shouted, trying her best not to grin back. Her ribs were burning from holding back laughter.

“Well I don’t see why Six can wear a dress and I can’t.” Bael mock pouted. “Can I borrow one of yours? I think I’d look smashing in floral print.” He leaned back and posed like a supermodel.

With that image in her head Maharet couldn’t hold it in any longer. She let out a snort of laughter. Once that first crack had formed in her facade it was too late to stop the laughter from pouring out. Soon all three of them were laughing. “You stupid, stupid, demon.” Maharet squealed. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. “I’m not going to let you wear my dress!”

The words were barely out of her mouth before Bael had bolted up the stairs. “Try and stop me!” He shouted.

Maharet sprinted after him and tackled him to the bed. Bael tried to twist away but she had him pinned. “What are you going to do now, funny guy?” She asked.

Bael thought about it for a second. “Something stupid.” He said, leaning close until they were face to face. He could feel her warmth above him, her weight pressing against him. They were so close now, breathing each other’s breath.

She could feel it too. They had started out separate but the bond had made them into two halves of the same demon. And both halves wanted to be united. “Wait there.” Maharet said. She got up and locked the bedroom door.

There was a tension in the air, potential energy crackling in the space between the two demons. Light was leaking through the edges of the door frame. Maharet stood there, silhouetted, waiting for something. She was as beautiful as ever, standing there in the half dark.

Rising to his feet Bael walked over and took her in his arms. “This is dangerous.” He said, brushing his lips against her hot soft skin. He walked a row of kisses up from her neck to just behind her ear. “If we do this there’s no knowing what will happen.”

“Well then we should probably hold off.” She replied, leaning in to rub her forehead against his chest. “The closer we are the stronger the bond gets.”

“Well then on the count of three we should separate.” Bael suggested. “One, two...”

But he never got to three.