The Monster Aspires to Be a Hero!

Morning!
With that jarring sound, my body began moving on its own.
In a half-dazed state, I was dragged to the bathroom, stripped of my top, and directly showered.
The cold April water chilled my head, snapping me to full alertness.

Warm water!
As Jjambene shouted that, warm water indeed began flowing from the showerhead.
It seemed the rascal had pressed the bath button.
I blankly reached for the shampoo and began lathering my hair.
The moment I thought I had washed my hair thoroughly, the shower rinsed away the suds.
Figuring I should wash my face while at it, I cupped the shower water in my hands and cleansed my face too.

Rinse thoroughly, leaving no residue.
Jjambene then squirted cleansing foam into my hands.

I’m not Jjambene!
The monster presence shouted that before rather roughly lathering the cleansing foam onto my face.
With emotion imbued in its tentacles, scratching sounds arose each time it touched my face.
Quite painful, so I brushed its tentacles away and carefully washed my own face instead.
Then I sensed the presence had grown curiously silent.
Perplexed, I opened my eyes slightly to find it lathering its own tentacles with foam in the mirror.
“What are you washing yourself for?”

Washing oneself after waking up is basic!
How absurd.
After rinsing my face and toweling off the water from my hair, the presence snatched the towel from me.
It then used the towel to wipe the moisture from its tentacles before carelessly tossing it into the laundry basket.

The left is merely an assistant.
In that moment, I learned its tentacles even distinguished between left and right hands.
As someone who rarely skipped breakfast, I had planned to simply make some toast with bacon and fried eggs.
But as I rose to prepare them, the tentacle presence opened the fridge and retrieved the bread, eggs, and bacon itself.
This level of convenience truly tempted me to just leave everything to the monster presence.
The saying ‘humans grow lazy in an instant’ – that was precisely the feeling.
While humans have two hands, each person mainly uses one preferentially.
Most people favor their right hand, unable to perform precise actions with their left.
So the notion was that having four hands wouldn’t provide much advantage.

Ahem, ahem. Good morning! Sending a text like this~
Like a morning talk show host, the monster presence cooked while singing songs.
With four hands, the cooking was done in an instant.
As it cooked, I noticed the portions seemed larger than usual.

Yummy!
Saying that, it piled the finished toast with eggs and bacon, then devoured it all.
Yes, devoured.
Come to think of it, with those tentacles it had even consumed another monster, so this was probably easy for it.

Delicious!
It even reached for a roll of tissue to wipe its mouth.
By now, it no longer felt like merely having gained a sense of self, but like observing an entirely separate human entity.
I blankly ate the portion allocated for me, lost in thought.
Having passed the hero certification exam meant I could receive a temporary hero license.
It would likely be mailed within 2-3 days.
Then I would be assigned to intern at a hero office, police station, or other national institution.
Learning on-site while assisting citizens and cultivating the proper heroic mindset.
After completing the internship, I would gain qualifications to either open a private hero office or join a national institution.
Where should I aim for?

Definitely a hero office, no question.
“Why’s that?”

Because it’s cool.
The monster presence scoffed that working for national institutions would just make me a servant of the masses.

That doesn’t suit me at all.
“Is that so?”

From olden times, heroes have been fated to live in the shadows. Evaluating them as mere occupations in this deranged world.
Sinister forces lurking in darkness.
Apostles of the dark who slay those stretching their demonic hands toward civilians, safeguarding the city’s peace.
That seemed to be the monster presence’s perception of heroes.
It apparently held Batman in quite high esteem too.
“Fuh… let’s go. We have school.”

I wish it would end soon.
Uttering those curiously college student-like words, the monster presence and I left the house.
I glanced next door, but there was no sign of Una… was that her name?
She had certainly come to deliver a housewarming rice cake when moving in, but I hadn’t sensed any activity since.
It felt like she had been away from home ever since delivering that rice cake the day after moving in.
Just what was going on?
I dismissed my thoughts about her and headed to the bus stop.
After walking for a while, Jieun sent me a KakaoTalk message.
The usual suggestion to go together.

Hoohoohoohoo.
The monster presence made some owl-like sounds before starting to squirm.
“What is it?”
With an odd feeling, I stopped in my tracks, and soon a change manifested.
“Ehh?”
That area of my average size began swelling larger.
“Hey.”

23cm, 6.3 inch girth…
Is that even a normal human size?
As my previously average area suddenly enlarged, the dangling sensation became unbearably peculiar.
Clinging tightly against my thighs, it truly felt bizarre.

You’ve become a blessed man. Jieun will surely love this size.
The presence said that with a laugh.
Such insanity… Well, bigger does seem preferable.
Initially uncomfortable, as it grew larger, so did my self-esteem.
“Ah.”
As I walked toward the bus stop, Jieun spotted me and waved.

Like a girlfriend awaiting her boyfriend.
What did you just say?

Time to utilize those 23cm!
Not happening, you lunatic.
When I mentioned passing the hero certification exam, an awkward silence fell over the club room.
“For real?”
Taeil simply asked that in a dazed expression.
“Yeah. I haven’t received the license yet, but I passed.”
“Wow…”
Siwoo stared at me with a dazed look, awkwardly applauding.
Right after the new semester started, I had declared my intentions to become a hero.
And I actually achieved that in just a month.
Since the hero certification exam was reputed to be quite difficult, everyone seemed surprised.
“Hey.”
With a very serious expression, Jungheok rummaged through his bag and called out to me.
“What is it?”
“Have you practiced your signature yet?”
He said that as he handed me a notebook and pen.
“I should get it early before they become expensive.”
Starting with Jungheok’s joke, the club room became lively with chatter.
As we continued chattering for a while, Jieun glanced at me with a rather complicated expression.
“What’s wrong?”
“So you’ll be working at a hero office or joining a national institution now, right?”
“I suppose so?”
“It’ll be harder to meet with you, Sunbae… that’s what I thought.”
“Well, it’s already kind of like that these days, isn’t it?”
From Monday to Thursday, I attend school, but not really for classes.
With 9 credits being N/P courses, I only need to attend from Monday to Wednesday.
Yet I still come on Thursdays to spend time with these folks, knowing our remaining time together isn’t long.
But once I start interning at a hero office, even that will become difficult.
I would likely spend Thursdays to Sundays interning at the hero office.
Additionally, after this semester, I will have accumulated enough credits to graduate.
An early graduation six months ahead is possible.
So Jieun’s reluctance was understandable.
The prospect of reduced meetings with these club mates also left me feeling a tinge of regret.
“I’m just joking.”
Jieun said that before patting my back, encouragingly telling me to work hard.
And so I shared the news of passing the hero certification exam with the club members and other close acquaintances.
They congratulated me, suggesting we hold a celebratory party later.

Congratulations!
The monster presence also said that.
Monster… hmm.
“Hey.”
After confirming no one else was around, I addressed the monster presence.

What is it?
“I was thinking we should give you a proper name now. Constantly referring to you as ‘monster’, ‘it’, ‘neighbor’ is getting tiresome.”

Hmm…
The monster made a sound as if unenthused.
As if doubting my naming sense.
“How about Greed?”

Greed?
“With our symbiotic situation and the skin-hardening ability, so…”
I adapted a name from some manga.

Yeah, Greed! From today, I’m Greed!
Despite saying the name would be their choice, the reaction was quite positive.
It seemed some aspects had changed, but the core essence remained unaltered.
As I conversed with the presence and headed home, that person was hobbling along the street.
“Nnnngh! Eeek!”
It was Una, my next-door neighbor.
When we first met, her presence had been quite overwhelming and uncomfortable, but seeing her like this gave a fresh impression.
When she had delivered the housewarming rice cake, she had seemed remarkably poised and sharp, but now she simply looked pained.
I had heard Una had been hospitalized for over a year due to the Superhuman Syndrome.
But barely over a month wouldn’t be enough for a full recovery.
A patient who had barged into the neighboring house, adamant about repaying some debt.
Perhaps she had been lurking around under the guise of repaying me, conducting unlawful background investigations.
An annoyance and public nuisance, but I couldn’t simply abandon someone grunting in pain like that either.
“Long time no see.”
“Huh? Ah, Jinwoo.”
As I spoke up, Una dropped the grunting act, reverting to her sharp, self-possessed demeanor.
Around a week had passed since Una had delivered that rice cake to me.
She had certainly moved into the neighboring house, yet I hadn’t seen her since that day.
And only now did I understand the reason.
She must have forced herself to deliver that rice cake.
Her legs had clearly not fully recovered, unable to live independently yet.
Yet she had put on that act to make an impression on me?
Outwardly maintaining a cold, haughty facade of nonchalance.
But in reality, grunting and hobbling along like that – just imagining it was laughable.
“Are you even supposed to be discharged from the hospital and moving around like this?”
“I’m… going for rehabilitation exercises.”
Una said that with a slightly sullen expression.
“Really? But this isn’t near any hospitals…”
“Nearby… there’s… a training room that also offers rehab exercises.”
“Ah…”
What a coincidence.
I had also been looking into training rooms and gyms.
“Let’s go together. I should register too.”
I didn’t want to leave someone in such apparent pain hobbling alone.
“…”
At my words, Una smiled faintly, as if having succeeded at something.
Perplexed, I stared at her, only for a vehicle to stop right before us.
Ah, I see.
Of course someone grunting like that wouldn’t make their way here alone by foot.
Perhaps from the very start, she had confirmed I would be coming to this area and prepared accordingly.
I had been completely outmaneuvered.
Just what debt did she owe me?
My feelings were quite conflicted.