Yes, It’s Me. The Obsessive Side Top

#014

I half-heartedly attended the remaining lectures. Kim Shin told me that while I’d always been strange, lately, I’d been strange in a different way. Well, it’s not like being strange is anything new for me. I spent my days in a daze, barely responding to anything, and before I knew it, the exams were right around the corner. The midterms start tomorrow. After studying so hard with the test bank, I was given an even more incredible test question straight up. So, I fell into a dilemma about what to do.

I disposed of the test questions the day I received them. I put them through the shredder in Ha Jin’s study. It shredded them perfectly. For a moment, I had the urge to stop, but I let them go through. I felt like having those papers in my possession would taint my life.

However, it bothered me that the questions remained in my memory since I had seen them. After deep contemplation, I made a difficult decision.

Whatever Ha Jin was like in the past, I am Ha Jin now.

So, I’ll live my way.

* * *

“What am I going to do with you… you bastard.”

Father had an extremely angry look on his face. It was even worse than the first day we met when he had beaten someone up. It felt like he’d forgotten to put on his usual smiling mask today. Before I could even have a proper reunion with my father after two months, I had to squeeze my eyes shut at the sight of another flying ashtray.

‘Damn it, they should switch to lightweight plastic ashtrays. Isn’t a glass ashtray basically a murder weapon?’

—THWACK!

The ashtray hit me square in the face, as if he’d been practicing for accuracy. The left side of my face felt like it had shattered, and all my senses focused on that pain. I wanted to collapse on the floor, roll around, and scream in agony, but the dark and gloomy atmosphere made me stand still and endure it silently.

Like before, the ashtray fell to the floor with blood on it. Because it hit me directly instead of grazing me, my left cheek took the full impact. Judging by the warm feeling flowing down my face, it must have been cut.

“Sir!”

Secretary Kim, who was always calm, rushed to stop my father. That’s how serious my father’s anger was—and how severe my injury was.

“Can’t you even eat the food that’s being spoon-fed to you? What do you want me to do? You didn’t take the exam? Huh, in all my life, this is the first time I’ve seen this kind of rebellion. Why? What’s the problem? You’ve been quiet lately—were you preparing to pull this big stunt?”

I opened my mouth to speak but had to close it due to the intense pain in my cheekbone.

“What’s lacking? What haven’t I given you? Let a kid live as they please, and they try to climb too high. Do you know how much money I spent getting you into that school?”

“Admission and graduating at the top of your class. Do you know how much I poured in for those conditions? Is it that hard to just quietly graduate from A University at the top of your class? If that’s too difficult, should I have someone take the exams for you?”

I could somewhat understand Father’s anger. He had poured money into properly educating his son, only to have it suddenly thrown away. Yes, it was worth being angry about, but not enough to destroy someone’s face. Fighting through the stinging pain, I managed to open my mouth.

“I’ll… handle… my studies… myself.”

It felt like my bones were crumbling with every word. Despite my effort, it seemed I hadn’t convinced Father, as his face remained scowling.

“You bastard, talking nonsense just because you have a hole in your face. Say something that makes sense. You’re going to study? You’re really being ridiculous. Did you take your first-year exams yourself? Did you get into that university on your own merit? I’ve been feeding money into this since high school to get you admitted. You did the same thing back then too. So why are you acting like this now?”

“Sir, you can’t!” 

Secretary Kim barely managed to stop Father as he raised his hand. Father took deep breaths to control his emotions. Looking at Ha Jin’s empty head, the admission was indeed suspicious. Sure enough, there had been corruption since high school. Nothing surprising anymore.

“You seem to think Eunha Group needs someone smart like you. Smart people are the ones we can hire. We’re just the ones who give orders and make choices. Understand, Ha Jin? No matter how much we study, we can’t catch up to naturally smart people.”

His voice had calmed somewhat, becoming eerily normal compared to before. It really showed he was a corporate Chairman, being able to control himself so quickly. I quietly listened to his words. The communication was so one-sided. Even if I said more, he had his ears blocked, making real dialogue seem impossible.

“You know why I married your mother without looking at other conditions? I only looked at appearance. I thought my heir needed to have an incredible face if nothing else. That’s how your grandfather married your grandmother and had me. You know why? Because that makes people pay more attention and desire you more. All we need is people’s attention and reverence. Don’t think about using your head, Ha Jin. We have excessive money and the looks they like. That’s all we need.”

Father kept clenching and unclenching his fists, desperately wanting to do something about my silence.

“I’ve been good to you. Did I ever say anything about you living like a bastard? I just told you not to beat people up. I said it was fine to spend money and play around like a dog. I told you you were doing well because it made people pay attention to you and grovel at your feet. Right? Our Ha Jin should listen to Daddy. But fucking hell, you don’t take the exam? Are you in your right mind? People need to know you’re smart. Do you know how much money I spent creating that image?”

Father walked over and leaned back on the sofa. He covered his eyes with one hand, as if he couldn’t bear to look at me. With his other hand, he waved dismissively, shooing me away like an unwelcome guest. His weary gesture made me feel like nothing more than a nuisance.

“Secretary Kim, clean this up. Thoroughly.”

“Yes, sir.”

Secretary Kim approached me and quietly suggested we leave. I had no strength left to say anything, so I followed him out. The office manager at the desk bowed her head in concern when she saw me.

As soon as we entered the private elevator, Secretary Kim urgently examined my face. He dropped his usual tired office worker expression and frowned with worry. When he touched my face, a sharp pain shot through to the back of my head. My eyes fluttered from the intensity, and he carefully pressed a handkerchief to my face. It quickly soaked through with a large amount of blood.

Looking at the handkerchief now stained crimson, I couldn’t help but wonder what Father thought when he saw me. How could someone not care at all when their own son’s face is covered in blood and still say whatever they pleased?

“Doesn’t it hurt?”

“It hurts… even… talking… is difficult.”

“If it hurts, you don’t need to answer.”

When I stopped speaking, Secretary Kim adjusted the clean part of the handkerchief and gently wiped my face, his expression dark with concern. His gentle touch and worried demeanor revealed a different side of him, which felt strangely comforting. I had assumed he saw Ha Jin as just a troublesome burden that increased his workload. It seemed he cared more than I had thought.

“Still, you should have just taken the exam, young master. What’s this all about, suddenly? You’ve never done anything like this before. Even if you’re growing up, why in this way?”

Secretary Kim drove me to the hospital himself. I hadn’t expected Father to react so violently. It had been a mistake to think of him as a normal, caring parent. And I felt a pang of sympathy for Ha Jin. His father had absolutely no faith in him, viewing him as nothing more than a puppet meant to dance to his commands. That thought lingered, refusing to leave me.

The cut near my eye eventually required surgical sutures, and a large bandage covered my face. It looked ridiculous, as there was no way to hide the injury.

“Well, thank goodness. If the impact had been just a bit more to the front, your eyeball would have ruptured.”

At the doctor’s assessment, Secretary Kim’s expression turned even more remorseful. He blamed himself, saying he should have done more to prevent it. What’s done is done, but if nothing else, I wished they would at least get rid of that glass ashtray.

Since it hurt too much for me to speak, Secretary Kim asked the doctor questions on my behalf.

“There won’t be any scarring, right?”

“We’ll do our best to prevent that. Ha Jin should absolutely avoid drinking alcohol and get plenty of rest. Take the medication on schedule. And don’t forget to come to the hospital daily for disinfection.”

I had no intention of living with traces of my damn father’s violence. Since I wanted to heal cleanly, I nodded.

While driving me home, Secretary Kim kept making earnest requests. He said we could arrange for a make-up exam, citing illness as the reason, and pleaded with me to take it. He was so insistent that I absolutely had to agree, so I nodded.

When I got home and lay in bed, the pain kept me from falling asleep easily. Only after taking another painkiller did the throbbing subside. Because of the wound, I couldn’t even lie on my side. I had to lie flat, staring up at the ceiling.

‘Damn Ha Jin. If his father was such a bastard, he should have at least warned me.’

In the webtoon, his father always had this kind-looking laugh, making me think Ha Jin’s family must be decent people. I had wondered how such a delinquent could have come from such a seemingly good man. But now it all made sense. Like father, like son. Understanding why Ha Jin’s personality turned out this way made me feel a pang of sympathy for him.

‘Damn… being a chaebol isn’t for just anyone.’

My already wide-open eyes began to sting. The image of Ha Jin’s worn-out face from the webtoon kept coming to mind. At the same time, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for him.

What was that damn author thinking when creating Ha Jin’s character? I suddenly felt afraid, wondering if there could be even more unfortunate storylines ahead.