She Returned as a Vampire

21 – Is it love or obsession?

Now I’m trying to smile at the warmth that I put so much that my lower belly visibly bulges.

“Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah…”

…Everything would have been perfect if you hadn’t sobbed.

“I’ve said many times that I don’t like this…”

If I hadn’t managed to gather my clothes and cover my reddened body in such a hurry, I wouldn’t have felt this uncomfortable, no… I wouldn’t have been sick.

Why do you keep hurting me?

“Don’t cry, Niel. Wasn’t this what you wanted? I don’t understand. Didn’t you want it to go back to how it was before?

First of all, while I was tempted a lot,

You begged me to love you so desperately with your body,

As you gave me your blood and confessed your love to me,

Why are you talking about something different now? Huh? Uncomfortable…”

“You said it… I’ve said it many times…”

Sobbing, very annoying.

Looks like I was wrong. I’ll still love you, but it’s like – forced.

We are in love.

I just gave my arms to the person who loved me while sacrificing my life.

Why – Why are you reacting like this? Huh?

“Niel, hahahaha – Niel. You know I love you. How much do you know how much I love you? I say

Why can’t you make me a bad monster?

Don’t flinch. Don’t go into corners like that.

Are you afraid of me? Niel? Huh? Hate me?”

“…You’re not normal, Elena. I don’t know what you’ve become, but I do know that it’s not good at all.”

It’s like a drowning cat.

Blind your eyes like that –

Are you saying this, Niel? Huh? Are you doing this to me?

“I’m trying to get angry, Niel. You shouldn’t be so uncomfortable with people you love.”

“Does this look like love? Can’t you see what has become of me?”

“I can see it. It’s okay. The man who was covered in love and cried under me, ang& ang&?”

“…Crazy. You’re so damn crazy…”

Are you crazy? Are you talking about me?

I’m crazy about you. Cancer. Don’t go crazy. I can’t go crazy

“The person I love tries to hold me in his arms somehow while moaning in pain,

It’s even weirder if you don’t go crazy watching a man who tries to love you while crying like that.

And, don’t say that, Niel. Don’t say that…

I’m trying so hard to get closer to you, but why do you keep arguing?”

“Antal? Do you- do you think this is angtal?”

“So what am I supposed to say? Am I supposed to think you hate me? You hate me?

…That’s not in the options in the first place.

Did you love me, or did you love me even more than you do now? There will be only that.

Other than that, I can’t see or hear anything else.

I’m not going to do that in the first place, Niel. Do you know what I mean?”

“Elena, you, you- “

“Just say you hate it. At that time, I really won’t let you go.”

“Ugh…!”

I don’t like it from one to ten.

I really don’t like your reaction.

My hair is all messed up. Why are you doing this

Didn’t you want this kind of love? Wasn’t it nice for me to hold you tight like this?

“What are you complaining about, Niel? Tell me. Don’t make that face. Say it. Don’t keep making me feel so weird. Say it.”

Am I doing something wrong? Now? Am i a bad b*tch?

Why?

I have engraved the sign that I care so much for the person I love so much that it overflows.

The mark that says it’s mine is very deep and dark on the neck.

Like I did before, I made marks on my body again and again,

And who is it that you hold me in my arms and bite your shoulders, suck it, and spit on it?

“…Tell me. You know. I’m asking because I really don’t understand. I’m not kidding. Seriously.

See you here? This shoulder here? Do you know who made this?”

“It was fire, force majeure… The feeling…”

“I like it, right? Huh? It felt good working with me. Then it’s good, right?!”

“I don’t mean that! I mean – “

“Don’t play with words in front of me. I won’t forgive you for hurting my heart like that, Niel.

No matter how much you…

No, it’s not because it’s you. It really hurts…!

It hurts more because it’s you…”

I don’t want to cry again, I don’t want to keep hurting like this… Why do you keep me like this… Why…

“I, I did this because I like you. I loved you so much. Why do you say that I did something wrong again? I do this to love you, but why do you keep saying that I did something wrong? Huh?”

“Elena, this is… This is not love. This is – there was no such thing as love here.”

What?

Did I hear it wrong?

Or were you talking nonsense?

“You know what.

How do you know what state I am in?

If I just smell your scent, I want to rush at you right away.

You smell so sweet, I’m just putting up with what I want to throw away just now, seeing you, what?

No love, no?”

“I-I didn’t mean it in that sense, no, no, no, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Elena, please, no! No, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!!”

Pick up and tear off clothes that get in the way,

…It’s very shredded. I can’t even think of covering that lascivious body with this.

I mean, show that mark right in my eyes.

Yes.

Show me the red flowers blooming on that pale skin.

Don’t cover it… With your hands like that. Yes.

“Leave this… Please, Elena… That’s embarrassing…!”

“Why do you keep making me… A b*tch? Why, why.

Haa… Your back will hurt, so follow me. I have to do it in bed.”

I told him to follow me, but he didn’t listen again.

I keep struggling, and I can’t even win by force, so…

“No, no, please – don’t do this, Elena, I don’t want to do that again, no…!”

“I’m just doing something to make you feel better. Why do you keep getting so scared? Am I going to eat you? Huh?”

“Ugh…!”

What can I possibly do?

Is it the right thing to do with someone who stubbornly refuses to do so in the first place? No love here – no, no, no.

…I keep sighing.

“Yes, I know.

I know… I know, but I know I shouldn’t be like this.

But I can’t stand it.

If I don’t do this, you won’t recognize me.

I can’t go back anyway, and I don’t want to go back.

The me you deny now is far cleaner than that filthy b*tch when I was a human.

In hindsight, it might be a lot cleaner now.

Because after becoming a monster, I dedicated my whole new body and mind to you.”

“Consideration is… You know-“

“I didn’t know. If I had known consideration, I wouldn’t have treated you harshly like that.

Don’t you remember?

Seeing that you are prudent, they laugh at you as a coward,

Don’t you remember the very day I left you alone in this cold house and went out with that son of a b*tch?

Of course, we didn’t go alone. Other adventurers joined in, too!

Anyway, anyway.

If I knew you were considerate, I should have pretended to lose to you.”

Okay, now you understand?

Looks like you’ve realized something.

Admit it.

I am a much better woman now than I was when I was a human.

It suits you, go ahead and admit it.

“…Yes, then, you haven’t changed at all.”

“What?”

“Think of what you are doing now.

Look at you who raped me like this and tried to drag me away again saying I didn’t understand you.

Is this correct? Huh? Is it right?

You haven’t changed at all. Nothing has changed since you were the person you hated!”

That can’t be. You say I’m the same as that year? You’re like that b*tch who treated you like a b*tch?

“No, no, different? It’s different, Niel. Right now I’m trying to care for you. I’m trying to show that.

That b*tch didn’t even do this. I didn’t even love you like this How long has it been since you mixed your body like this?”

“Admit it, Elena. Nothing has changed just because your body has changed. It just makes you more impatient, you.

Because I’m not human, I’m afraid because I’m not – “

Stop it.

Stop it.

Just… Just… Quiet.

I didn’t want to do this.

I didn’t want to do this because I thought you didn’t like it.

“This, don’t do this, Elena, please, no neck…Don’t do that again…!”

“You know, don’t you hate it that much?”

To the point of pushing me away like this, desperately looking into my eyes and begging me?

“Doing this… It’s not love. It’s just… Obsession. My body and my heart are soggy because I’m afraid they’ll leave…”

“What’s the difference between love and love? Being afraid that you’ll leave, scared that you won’t be happy when you’re with me.

If you don’t love, you won’t have that kind of heart.

What’s different?”

“Work, stop for now. Really… You’re really strong, stop!”

Come now?

Really?

Look at how you make that kind of sacrifice again and just give it to me.

And that’s called love.

I don’t care that my heart is burning.

Okay then.

“Ah! Ah black,, uh black … No, no …! .. &”

You know.

If you call that kind of love.

I have to teach you a new meaning of love.

Both of you should be happy.

It’s not love when both sides are having a hard time.

At least like this, if you put this liquid I am producing into your body,

I don’t know how you feel,

“Ahhhhh”

You stick out your luscious tongue little by little and look at me with hazy eyes.

Like this, I entangled my tongue… I pushed my tongue deep… That’s right, you came like this too…

Roll it once, and mix it with a lot of mud.

Knock. That’s right.

“Zhung, chwum… Puha, how are you feeling?”

“Huh, huh & “

Yeah, look at that.

This is love.

While warming your body and mind,

Like this, being held back in your arms and screaming sweetly.

That’s happiness.

Why can’t I be honest?

It hurts.